how i would narrate the Olympics
me: they're doing some athletic shit
me: and omg look at that butt
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laughcentre:

don’t you hate it when you offer help and the other person says yes

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famous people might have fans but i have airconditioning 

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"There are two important days in your life. The day you were born, and the day you find out why."

- Mark Twain

(Source: theunquotables)

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plot twist: i turn attractive
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me: sometimes i talk to myself
me: omg same
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myvillageidiots:

have you ever looked on the mirror and said “i’m so predebut”

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Truth is, I’d really hate to see you with someone else.

(Source: itspammybby)

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me at restaurants: is there wi-fi
me at the mountains: is there wi-fi
me at the beach: is there wi-fi
me at family parties: is there wi-fi
me at school: is there wi-fi
me in hell: is there wi-fi
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